HOUSE ON THE EDGE OF THE PARK: Murder, Mayhem...and a Whole Buncha' Boogying
By: Bryan Bloodsoaker

 House on the Edge of the Park: 1980 - Rated R, 89 min, Directed by Ruggero Deodato, Starring: David Hess, Giovanni Lombardo Radice, Annie Belle, Christian Borromeo, Marie Claude Joseph

Cinematic statutory offense specialist David Hess, (Alex), teams up with his retarded buddy Giovanni Lombardo Radice/John Morghen, (Ricky), for an extreme nighttime get together at a house party on the edge of some park in the greater Manhattan area

On a fistful of occasions, Alex forces his love onto and into a series of unwilling female cast members. It’s really surprising that director Ruggero Deodato did not stop filming to make a citizen’s arrest on Mr. Hess’ character for some of his psychopathic behavior, but like all other productions that were filmed during the disco era of the early 1980’s, the show must indeed go on.

The flick’s opening scene depicts a very gentle car horn honking exchange between Alex and the girl of his dreams. Alex quickly makes his move and offers a unique way of getting to know her a little better by eventually forcing her into her own backseat for what appeared to resemble a four-wheeled version of Motel 6. In this case however, it seemed more like Motel 666. To enhance the overall mood of this scene, the soundtrack tuned into a lullaby-esque piece of classical sheet music with the main verse ringing out, “Sweetly, Oh Sweetly…,” which seemed to camouflage the on screen violence to nothing more then a G-rated episode of Sesame Street.

Almost as fast as it took Alex to pull his pants up from the back seat of Motel 666, we find ourselves into the next scene already, where Ricky is getting “shined up” strictly for boogying purposes. “Are we gonna boogie?” Ricky gleefully shouts out. Alex has thoughts that go well beyond the act of boogying, as he gives himself one more handsome look into the mirror and proceeds to grab the sharpest razor from out of his locker. It’s always a wise move to go into the night with your best, most effective razor, or at least that’s what I’ve been told anyway.

"Ricky dominates the first round of strip-go-fish."

In exchange for some high-tech auto-repair work, Alex and Ricky, find themselves headed directly into a house party scam in what would later be discovered as a complete setup, which ultimately leads to Alex floating facedown in a swimming pool. Sorry to spoil the ending like that but we have more important things to discuss right now.

"Alex finding it difficult to resist a gal in knee socks."

One of the most heart-felt scenes this flick has to offer includes a beautifully choreographed segment where Ricky becomes so emerged into his boogying practices that he proceeds to strip down to his Batman Underoos. The other party attendees sharing this experience show their support by cheering out a variety of groovy one-liners including the likes of, “That’s Really Flying,” “Move That Thing,” “Shake It,” “Dig It,” “Let It All Hang Out,” and “Hot Diggity.” All of this takes place while Ricky rips a page outta the book of Saturday Night Fever, proceeding to mark his territory on the shag carpeted dance floor.

Other notable scenes include Ricky’s vicious poker (ahhh...humm, go-fish) game that showcased a real royal straight and Alex’s splashable shower which proves once and for all that he had the cleanest washed backside in the entire house.

"Testicle Target Practice!"

In order to make sure that bad things don’t happen to bad people, when planning any particular party, it’s important that all guests are having a good time. Alex presents us with a key caption bound to make any party a complete success story and that is as follows, “Let’s not spoil the party by doing the wrong thing.” If this simple rule is obeyed, nobody will end up floating facedown in the swimming pool just seconds before the closing credits!